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Uncle Dana

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Uncle Dana and Gramma Sheila What I remember best about my Uncle Dana was watching The Twilight Zone with him. He rambled when he spoke, and he had these little ears, he kept his hair short, and if it wasn’t for the fetal alcohol syndrome, he might’ve looked like Tom Hanks. Unfortunately, life just wasn’t kind to my poor Uncle, and that’s a damn shame now that he’s dead. It was a damn shame to begin with. I know it doesn’t go good to come off pitiful these days, but the story I got is the only one to tell. I feel like I have to. No one else is really there to remember. We were watching The Twilight Zone, an episode with Elizabeth Montgomery, and he said, “Gee whiz, I’d like to have gotten to know her. She sure is beautiful.” And the only thing my 21 year old self could think was this poor guy, he’ll never have anyone. Of course, what I did was engage with the hell yeahs, because she’s a hot ticket, and who wouldn’t have liked to, right? I felt bad for him. Neither of us was very old,...
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Helpful Pains

 Shakti collection. I said before self-denial was a way to collect Shakti, this life force, God Force if you prefer. More than no this and no that it’s also no grunting and moaning and groaning if you hurt like shit. Taking pain without expression of any kind is a way to collect, and since I have arthritis and osteoporosis still in my right hip, this stuff all hurts like a son of a bitch. I pushed myself harder today. I sat for forty-five minutes. At the beginning of this, I was getting 22. Stretches first. Then, finessing my legs into half-lotus, which as I’ve said, has a tendency to push my knee out of place. A good forward kick, maybe with a little help from my arm, takes right good care of it. It hurts like hell, though. Once that’s done, I practice posture, asana, which means I have to roll my bastard hips forward, which stretches the knee. If I didn’t know better, I’d think I had a rubber patella. That’s what it feels like. Big Prana in the sitting. It’s very cool. You can ac...
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My First Novel, Prince Junkie: Not A Glorification of Drugs

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Get  Prince Junkie  on Paperback or Kindle here. Art by Kasey Hill I’ve deleted the same shit paragraph about six times. I wrote this to separate myself from the homeless experience. The writing helped me put my brain back together. You lose a lot of personality development if you fall that far down the spiral. It has taken me quite a while to stitch, stretch, and study my psyche and my body, which were both broken, beaten, cut, and otherwise abused by both myself and others while I was out there. Everything in my system rebelled against my subjecting its electric tentacles once more to any kind of square life. It rebelled hard. Regressions were a factor. My body’s weakness was a factor. All these things, and I with only a vague notion that they had to be fixed. I barely knew where to begin. And I didn’t want to. I didn’t want to do work like that. Or anything square. So I forced my frail, scattered ass to write. And that evolved. My studies gave Ben an advantage over me...
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A Piece of a Substack: I Am the Collection Plate

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No, not that kind. I am the collection plate. I’m not going to explain everything about Shakti. When you ignore a desire, good or bad doesn’t matter, you collect Shakti. That’s all you need to know about it in order to read this. It is good to collect, for that collection builds aura, which is one of, if not the most important storehouses of strength in the body. It’s not in the muscles, though they help—a scrawny man can be very strong if he needs to be. If he has aura or is using drugs that give a synthetic aura and still maintains his wherewithal, he will be strong (or synthetically enhanced) in his soul—what people often call heart I say is soul—the will draws from the soul and to strengthen the soul, one must strengthen their aura. This is what draws surrounding energy into a person. It should be noted that using a synthetic aura too often will sully the energy and make you sick; this sickness sits across from, though is not unrelated to, actual withdrawal symptoms. I know all th...
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36 Day Fast from All-Things Goony

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You too can have BPD, all you need is to believe in these dumb assed things too hard.  You know, because everyone with a beard and muscle is a paragon of genius. And if you wear glasses, you're that crying angry guy. Glasses make you a total spaz...right? Stupid. So. So. Stupid. Okay, let's begin.  That title makes it sound like I was out to tear my pecker off. Twice a week is hardly that. For a single man, that’s actually pretty disciplined. Most people think all single men at my age do is stink up their rooms with porn musk. Gooning—and I’m not a Rotter—this is the one word from that ridiculous nonsense that actually hits home—it means more to spin your wheels than it means to masturbate. Couch Potatoes are Gooners, in this theory. Choosing to be based (fuck you, I’m not doing shit or changing my thinking, I don’t care if it’s good for me or not) is a form of Gooning. Over-posting (and adopting as personal philosophy) stupid memes is Gooning. Doomscroling is Gooning. Joinin...
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To Escape Dichotomous Thinking

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F or the fact that I need to read more.  The fact that I need to finish Polarity, a nd the other book, which needs much more R n’ D. For the fact that I need to finish the music I’ve been working on. And the fact that I need to draw more. Also, the fact that society must be appeased, because I live in it. I am taking an internet break. A real one, not that bullshit one I thought I was going to take and then didn’t because I had a book coming out. Now, I have nothing like that coming out, so this is the time. In this time, one thing I’ll do is be aware of dichotomous thinking. To see beauty, you must get away from the ugly. Sun squares will help. You’ll have to wait for the book to know what I mean by that. Not Polarity. The other one. I wrote a poem that said: and the plebes are all borderlines… Now…why? Why did I write that? Here’s why. DSM sez--BPD does that To be fair, it's saying they all do that.  This, if my comprehension isn’t entirely fucked, says that a disordered p...
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4 New Age Wernicke's Commands

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  Just so there's no confusion. I think everyone needs to become more aware of these, because their main focus is to kill empathy and the will to question authority. And they have evolved. I'm pushing this out quick before the morning's circuit, so I won't be going into great detail. Think on this if you are compelled. I promise it will act as a shield against the Swine's Shit Wave. By the way--that's Steve Bannon name for the current putsch we're all watching unfold in various ways. This will help you not have your brain turned into their Play-Doh, which is what the Swine want. And we don't have far to go.  Perhaps this will help.  In any case, don't quit anything you're doing on account of it, or use it to become an incel. If you do that, there's no sense in knowing this stuff b because they already have your ass. Continuing on-- 1. "Literally" used out of context until there is no context and it's just a buzzword. 2. "...
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